xGloryHole

I’m not gonna patronize you by pretending you don’t know what a Gloryhole is. This is 2022, and ‘Gloryhole’ is more a part of the modern lexicon than dumb made-up words like ‘lol’ and ‘Tweet’, so I’m betting you know exactly what one is. 

XGloryhole takes the premise, “what if you stuck your dick in a random hole in the wall and there was a hot bitch on the other side?” and really runs with it. All of their vids revolve around this simple but effective concept. If you’re really into the idea of hot chicks sucking your dick through a wall, but you also want to see said hot chicks (otherwise, how do you know if they’re hot?), then XGloryhole is the site for you.

Site Design of XGloryhole.com

XGloryhole.com ain’t trying to reinvent the wheel here. Their setup is simple, and like 95% of the porn sites out there – it has a homepage with a bunch of video thumbnails, a bunch of tabs at the top, and a few ads dotted around here and there.

Beyond that, it has to be said that XGloryhole.com is pretty fucking terrible. It does everything that a porn site basically shouldn’t do if it wants to attract or keep users. Here’s the process I underwent to open a single video on the site: 

● I click on a thumbnail. My browser opens up a new tab for the video (without asking me), and the original tab redirects to some bullshit spam site. 

● The video is overlaid with some static ‘fake video’ images with a fake play button. The fake play button opens a new window redirecting to a spam site. This happens twice. 

● A mandatory 5-second ad plays before the video. You might now be able to watch your video, or it might simply not work. 

● Scrubbing back or forth through the video (or pausing) can randomly cause new pop-ups to open. 

I don’t need to tell you how shitty this is when all you’re trying to do is bust a nut. When you’ve got high-quality experiences out there like PornHub or XVideos where you just click and go, having to navigate a labyrinth of pop-ups and asshole design bullshit just to maybe get to watch a video that you wanna watch is not the ideal viewing experience if you ask me. Even if you do manage to endure the trial-by-ordeal that is opening a video, pausing or scrubbing might cause all that bullshit to pop off again. 

On top of this, you have the regular ads. Now, I don’t mind a banner ad or two – these sites need to keep that free content ticking over somehow, amirite? – but the frequency and volume of ads are just too much on this. You’ve got huge banner ads, ads down the side, pop-up video ads, ads during videos, ads if you pause, hidden ads laid over videos before you can access them, and just constant fucking ads everywhere. 

The site has a bunch of tabs at the top, but they’re very limited in scope. This is obviously a specialist site, so you’re not going to get that much variety anyway, but they could have thrown in some tabs for different ethnicities and shit. As it stands, the tabs pretty much do the same thing – take you to some random, uncategorised Gloryhole vids. 

The site also has a search function, which is definitely better than the tabs but could be better. I searched for ebony chicks and got some good results, but searching for trannies (only for the purposes of this review, you understand) turned up one possible video and a bunch of broken links. And speaking of broken links – you’ll get them. A lot.  

I can’t imagine the average visitor's site visit duration, but if XGloryhole.com doesn’t get its shit together, I’d be amazed if anyone stuck around long enough to bust a nut.

Site Content

XGloryhole.com has – you guessed it – a bunch of Gloryhole vids. That might be their one niche, but boy, do they go to bat on this. They have roughly 1500 videos uploaded at present (November 2022) and are still going strong, so if you’re very much into your anonymous blowjobs and fucking, you’ll find plenty to fill your boots with. 

Getting to the videos can be a bitch, like I said, and the videos' quality is hit-and-miss. Weirdly, there isn’t one universal video player. Some have subtitle options for those who like to engage in some light reading while jerking off, and others don’t even have video quality options, so I hope you like your 240p. 

Some videos are available in HD, and some (but not all) let you choose between 1080p, and 760p all the way down to 240. Some are automatically set to HD, so I hope you ain’t watching them on data. 

Though XGloryhole is focused mostly on the titular gloryholes, there is a small amount of other stuff there too. There are a few cuck videos going on and a good chunk of interracial stuff (but usually involving a gloryhole). 

Desktop/Mobile Experience

The site loads fine on desktop, but as I’ve been over, the whole experience is just kinda crappy. I felt like my computer was getting AIDS off XGloryhole.com; the number of extra tabs, pop-ups, and shit slows the whole thing down, and there were enough broken links to make this my most frustrating wank since the VHS era.  

Weirdly enough, the site is much better on mobile. It looks cleaner, scrolls nicely, and lets you access videos faster. It ain’t all sunshine and roses, though; after I finished checking out the videos, I found another couple of tabs had opened to spam sites without asking me. This sort of stuff does not instil trust and just has me wondering why I don’t just go to a site that doesn’t open a million fucking pop-ups on my machine/phone. 

What I Liked About The Site

Oh boy, this is gonna be a tough one. XGloryhole.com is a bit like the proverbial red-headed stepkid who’s over 18: tough to love and even tougher to jerk off to. It does have a huge back catalog of videos to choose from, and I’ll be honest – some of those videos were pretty damn spicy. 

There’s a great one of some college sluts taking turns on some random cock, and I’ll admit that I was pretty jealous of that dude. Unlike me, though, that loser couldn’t see how hot the coeds that were slobbering on his cock were, so it’s hard to know who got the better deal there. 

Aside from some pretty decent vids, though, there ain’t a whole lot to love about Xgloryhole.com. 

What I Didn’t Like About The Site

If I haven’t already made this clear – a fucking lot. Where do I even begin? 

The site design is fucking atrocious. I’ve filed tax returns that were more fun to navigate than XGloryhole.com. The amount of ads that stand between you and a good, honest wank is frankly unforgivable, but not as unforgivable as the fakeout play buttons they stick over a lot of the videos. At one point, it had the balls to say “one more chance to hit the play button!” like they’re gonna give me a fucking game over screen or something. It’s like they don’t want any traffic to their site. 

On top of this, there’s a whole ton of broken links that make finding a video you can jerk off to a true ordeal. I’ve had easier wanks to milk cartons than to Xgloryhole.com. 

Suggestions I Have For The Site

Assuming ‘nuke it from orbit’ is off the table, I’d recommend a total overhaul. There’s no fixing this sort of ‘gotcha!’ mentality where opening unsolicited tabs and windows without the user’s consent is honestly permitted. The porn site game is as simple as this: get traffic, keep traffic, get more traffic. Offer some premium shit for those who can afford it and want more out of your site. But your site has gotta be good enough to keep people around in the first place. If it’s oversaturated with ads and makes opening a video more complicated than figuring out East Asian consent law, you’ve got a problem.

Conclusion

As it stands, there’s almost nothing to recommend Xgloryhole.com. It’s buggy, loaded with ads and full of tricksy shit that just annoys the user rather than leaves them satisfied. It’s got some good vids, but so does any other porn site – and most of them don’t trick their user into opening ads with every click. Hard pass – get over to Gloryholes.com instead.