FapHouse Party

What’s up, you phenomenal freak! How’s that crusty cock of yours doing? You using enough lotion? You don’t wanna be the guy who faps through blisters and scabs, do you?! Make sure you’re treating that little pecker with the respect it deserves! Use lotion and take breaks! I mean, it’s giving you orgasms! You might as well take care of it! (A little tip for when you finally get a girlfriend. Haha!) 

I’ve got a little bottle of rum right next to me. Today’s a good day. So, I’ve decided to kick back and watch my favorite porn clips before Mrs. PornDude and I end the night with some crazy drunk sex! That got me thinking… “When was the last time you saw someone drunk in a porn video?” I mean, I’m sure you won’t find a bunch of amateur shit on Pornhub after the great purge, right? 

Well, I decided to go to a pretty reliable amateur porn provider: Faphouse.com. This site consistently provides some of the best amateur porn on the web. I mean, you thought Xvideos was great. It is! For what you can get for free. If you want REALLY exciting amateur content, a subscription to FapHouse should satisfy you for the rest of your cum-filled life! Anyway, today, we’re gonna be talking about one of the most underrated categories of porn: Drunk porn. 

I mean, what’s better than being drunk? Fucking while you’re drunk! Obviously! But you’d have to learn to talk to girls while drunk, right? Well, there’s a catch-22, my friend: It gets a lot easier, and you get a lot worse at it! You can only fulfill one half of the equation: Get drunk! The next best thing from drunk sex is watching girls have drunk sex! 

The only thing is… apparently, there’s not much of that around. Probably something to do with laws surrounding post-nut regret, haha! Thankfully, there are a handful of fantastic freaks who would love for you to jack off to their sloppy mistakes! And there are a lot of professional sluts who’d love to get the chance to drink at their workplace! 

Clean Design and Messy Sluts

When you land on the page, you’ll have to get past the age verification. Wouldn’t want anyone under 18 to get the idea to drink and have sex, would we? They’ll need to figure that out on their own! There’s nothing remarkable about FapHouse’s design. It’s clean, well-organized, and easy to access. In terms of usability, it rivals some of the other bigger names. (Looking at you, Pornhub.) Although, I wish they would do something about that completely unsexy white background. 

FapHouse has one of the most impressive filters found on the left of the page. You can find pretty much any filter you need. You can even filter between FapHouse exclusive videos or exclusively exclusive videos (Fanclub). Not only that, but you can enjoy seamless video previews with each thumbnail. That means ZERO loading time. Not so much as a quick little loading rotation. Hover your cursor over the thumbnail, and you’ll be watching HD videos before you can even blink! 

And hey. Guess what? There are no ads. That’s right! No banner ads, no pop-up ads, no links redirecting you to some random sales page. Nothing. Just pure content. You know what that means don’t you? If you’ve read any of my blogs by now, you’ll know what’s coming next. That’s right… It’s a paid site. You’ll have to reach into that wallet yet again if you want to get the full experience of FapHouse’s high-quality amateur content!

Drinks & Sex. What Could Go Wrong?

Like I said, there aren’t a lot of drunk sex videos floating around. This is a category that should really get more love! I mean, what could be more entertaining than watching the industry’s top pornstars fuck while they’re absolutely blasted!? Who the fuck wouldn’t wanna see something like that? Well, with FapHouse, it’s quality over quantity yet again. We’ll have to take what we can get! 

Don’t worry, though… you can find exactly what you’d expect when alcohol and sex hit the internet! Haha! One of the first videos I came across featured an ebony couple playing drinking games. It was titled “Drinking Competition”. I wasn’t sure what the point of the competition was. It seemed to be “Whoever can drink the most gets to receive head”. So, of course, not far into the video, the girl opens up and gobbles her boyfriend’s cum like it was gonna save her life! 

Seriously, I don’t know what it is about these ebony amateur sluts, but their head game is always out of this fucking world. It’s like watching a super enthusiastic python get itself off! Like, holy shit! This bitch was more enthusiastic about drinking that guy’s cum than the fucking alcohol!

But drunk amateur sex isn’t the only thing you’re gonna find. That’s right! There are a lot of girls out there who are more than happy to drink on the job! There’s a video titled ”Lesbian Party With Alcohol and Tongues in Pussy” featuring a group of hot blonde and brunette babes getting drunk on champagne. These girls were wearing the classiest dresses and the hottest lingerie outfits. 

Imagine The Real Housewives of Hollywood, but for one episode, they all got in a party van and decided to get drunk and fuck each other. That image you had in your head? It’s EXACTLY that — With just the right amount of wealth, class, tackiness, and obvious lack of morals. Even the dildos were classy! They looked like they were made out of fancy marble! Who fucks themselves with a fancy marble dildo? A bitch with a bunch of money and no ambition, that’s who! 

One of my favorite videos features a mature older lady fucking her stepson’s friend. Now, this is as good as it gets when it comes to amateur content! It’s one of those videos that probably should come under something different than “amateur” porn. I mean, what do you call two regular people fucking and uploading themselves to the internet? “Raw”? You know what? From now on, that’s exactly what I’m gonna call it. 

The video is titled “Fat mature mom gets fucked by her stepson’s friend”. It’s the perfect [raw] amateur video. Just the right amount of weird but about three degrees from incest. So, you won’t feel THAT weird jacking off to a dude fucking his mom. (Unless you’re into that.) The video starts off with a lady lying in bed with her stepson’s friend, drinking a bottle of alcohol. 

This bitch is far from hot. But what does that matter? A fantasy is a fantasy, right? When you were a teenager, I’m sure you wanted to fuck some of your friends’ moms regardless of what she looked like! This guy did exactly that. Only on FapHouse will you find a dude having drunk sex with his friend’s ACTUAL stepmom. I can’t believe the drama that’s gonna cause when his friend finds this on the internet. You’d better hope it isn’t you! Haha!

What I Liked

FapHouse provides yet another amazing collection of amateur content. You’ll have to try really hard to find anything better than this. I mean, where else are you gonna find this level of drunken debauchery? I seriously just wish there were more videos like these. Each video is completely original and as unique as they come! There’s nothing like a bunch of drunken wild sluts to get you off! 

What I Didn’t Like

The only thing I hated about this was the lack of “drunk” videos. Tell me this wouldn’t be some of the most exciting amateur content on the fucking internet! Seriously, I should start some kind of petition! There isn’t even an official category for “drunk” porn on this site. I had to sift through videos using different keywords to find any. (You’re welcome, by the way.)

Tips From ThePornDude

So, my first tip. Add a dark mode. With a site as well-designed as this one, it’s pretty weird you don’t even have a fucking dark mode. You want your users to strain their eyes while they're beating off to your videos? Take some notes from Xvideos. You’ll get extra points if you include an automatic dark mode feature! 

My second tip. Add more “drunk” porn! There weren’t nearly enough videos for me to get off to during my search. I’m sure if you add a “drunk” category, it’ll encourage a lot of sloppy sluts to want to upload their adventures for us to enjoy!

Conclusion

As you can imagine, drunk sex is probably some of the most entertaining sex! And FapHouse provides some of the most entertaining drunk sex on the internet! It’s not exactly a hot category, but I’m sure whatever you find will be enough to satisfy your drunk fantasies! 

You’ll have to pay a subscription fee to watch any of these videos, though. So, if you’re looking to get off to “drunk” porn exclusively, then you might be better off looking somewhere else. Have fun, you little perv! Try not to hurt your cock!