Shoplyfter MYLF

I was hesitant to review this site … until I saw the previews. Look, what can I say – the name caught me off-guard. I thought it was going to be stupid. I’m on edge lately with websites that promise fictional scenarios in which pornstars are supposed to act like real people. Pornstars can’t act. This is a common trope and there’s truth to it. But the previews saved the day. Ten seconds into my first video trailer on ShopLyfterMylf I knew that I was about to witness something fantastic. A gorgeous milf got caught shoplifting at a mal. She was taken to the security office where the head of security made her strip down completely, to make sure she hadn’t pocketed anything. She hadn’t, or so it seemed. The security guard was thorough.

He made sure to check deep inside her asshole, where he found an entire goddamn pearl necklace. Can you imagine that? I love how they used an actual necklace for the scene instead of a small set of anal beads. It really sold me on the fantasy. And of course, the rest of the scene was just one on one sex. We all knew it was coming. But the whole fantasy was executed with such perfection that I loved every second of it. You don’t have to keep me a believer throughout the entire damn video. Just give me a nice and believable setup to ease me into the action. Then, whip out the cock and start the plowing – I don’t care. I’m already half-done with my fap. This content starts hard, continues hard and ends hard. The milfs are basically getting punished for their crimes in the best way possible. You don’t need law and order. You just need one devoted security guard to do his fucking job and be really thorough with his investigations. A cavity search a day keeps the police away. And, it saves tax dollars.

Absolutely Gorgeous MILFs

First of all, yes, they call it Mylf and not Milf. I guess they’re going for “mother that YOU would like to fuck” as in you, the viewer. Looks weird. Whatever. I’m gonna call them MILFs, for obvious reasons. I don’t normally go for older women, because I perceive them to be inferior. They’re like young women, but saggy and sometimes they’re even bloated. Too risky. I prefer nubiles. That said, if someone were to go through a roster for me and make sure that the MILFs in question are indeed worth fucking, then I’d definitely give them a stab.

Luckily, that’s exactly what ShopLyfterMylf did. They got their hands on a fuck-ton of amazing older women each of whom looks like a diehard beauty queen. These are the kinds of women you walk a mile through broken glass for. I know they’re older than you’re used to, but they’re also hotter than you’re used to and that’s saying a lot. These babes definitely deserve my cock and you should give them yours too, vicariously that is, through the screen. Fap to them. It’s of great importance that you fap to these women. It matters to me that they didn’t do all this work for nothing. These kinds of MILFs don’t just spawn every day. Plus, they’re going to get worse when they get even older, so cherish them now while you still can.

The Role-Playing is On Point

These professional MILF whores really put on the performance of a lifetime for ShopLyfterMylf and nowhere is that more apparent than in the Karen video. There’s an actual Karen video. You can look it up. It’s not hard to find. It’s high up on the list. For this video they got a blonde ass, posh ass, annoying ass looking bitch of a woman and instructed her to be as annoying and self-righteous as possible. She gets hauled off to the security office, as usual. And, throughout the whole thing, she’s just complaining about her rights and asking to talk to a manager. She doesn’t get to, of course and she gets strip searched like the rest of them. She’s livid. You can see the veins in her forehead about to burst. This is fantastic shit. It’s as if they took the Karen meme and turned it into a fetish. I love it. Who wouldn’t want to stick a cock into an annoying entitled woman’s mouth? I know I would.

Anyways, she changes her tune slightly when the security guard shoves his hand up her snatch and finds a ring that she stole from a jewelry store. She gets defensive, though no less annoying than before and then gets used like a cock sleeve, six ways to Sunday. The security guard absolutely decimates her and leaves her drenched in his cum. She gets what she deserves, so to speak. Keep in mind, this is all make believe and they’re putting on a fake show for you, the fapper. Still, it feels real as fuck. It helps that the bitch is livid throughout the video. It also helps that her entitlement seeps through the screen. The whole thing is a delight to watch. I had to rub one out to the trailer; I couldn’t help myself. This was the point at which I knew that this site had me hooked on promises of unforgettable smut.

Nubile Cuties

If older domineering bitches aren’t your cup of tea, worry not. ShopLyfterMylf made sure to put together a ton of videos that feature younger babes who can only be described as nubile innocents. They’re pornstars, so naturally they’re proper whores in real life, but for the sake of the scene, they really pull off an innocent vibe. They’re basically shy and embarrassed about the fact that they were caught shoplifting. They’re trying to play it off, hoping they don’t end up getting in trouble and this leads to a lot of agreeableness when the security guard suggests that his cock should be involved in the situation. They act like fish out of water and this really amplifies the overall sex appeal of the scene.

A lot of these scenes also feature additional babes in the form of security assistants. It’s their job to provide a bit of feminine domination over the shoplifters. They’re a fantastic addition to the action. You’ve got a security guard whom you’re supposed to experience the scene through. He’s your self-insert surrogate. He holds all the power. Then, there’s the gorgeous babe who’s being dominated. She could be willingly submissive out of fear or an absolute bitch who gets her comeuppance. Finally, you get an additional bitch who’s just there to provide more authority. She does this by getting dicked as well. But there’s a lot of pussy eating also. The whole goddamn site is a marvel of modern pornography. It doesn’t push the envelope too far. It’s not like I haven’t seen sex in a security office before. Still, the smut they do offer is properly irresistible. It’s the kind of porn you could recommend to just about anyone, provided they like pussy.

Worth Every Penny

Do I have to tell you that paying money for perfect premium porn makes sense? I know you can get similar shit on a free porn tube, but try to level with me for a moment. The main reason we don’t get high quality porn products as often as we’d like is because we don’t fork over the dough when we see something spectacular. ShopLyfterMylf goes a bit above and beyond the competition and they’re doing a fantastic job. Please, if you like this content, consider subscribing. Hell, I don’t care if you get a long-time sub. Get the lowest tier and download all of their smut. It’s not against the rules.

So, what are the rules? It’s simple. You get a subscription for their whole network and you get 48 different MYLF series. ShopLyfterMylf is just one of them. So, you get 48 times the content you thought you would, but the pricing is still within normal parameters. 1-month costs $30. 6 months cost $100 and you can get a lifetime subscription for $500. There’s also a daily membership for $1. My thoughts? Try the content for 23 hours, for a dollar. Make sure to cancel that sub immediately afterwards so you don’t get auto charged afterwards. Then, if you’re satisfied, get a monthly sub. If that works for you, move over to the unlimited tier. The six-month tier makes no sense and an unlimited sub shouldn’t be purchased until you’ve had a good chance to jack off to the content first. Try before you buy and all that.