Oldje 3Some

Everybody needs to fuck, even old people. I suppose what I should say is even old men. Everyone knows that old bitches are horny as fuck. A woman’s cock cravings age like fine wine. With each passing year, it gets stronger and more complex. It’s a shame that men don’t naturally keep up with our feminine counterparts. However, where man meets opposition, he creates tools to assist his journey. That's why plenty of dick pills are available to help an old fart keep his cock upright.

Tools for your Old Tool

Viagra changed the game for old people. I don’t know when guys used to stop fucking back in the day, but in this modern age, you can fuck all the way to the casket. That’s how I plan on going out. I’m going to have a heart attack or stroke during my vinegar strokes while I’m fucking a bitch half my age. 

And just as my soul leaves my body, so will the last nut I ever bust. The light at the end of my tunnel will be a glowing cervix. The angels coming to retrieve my earthen vessel will be two titties. When I reach the clouds of heaven, I’ll find them to be ass cheeks and open mouths. Wow. Death is starting to sound kind of good, actually.

Everyone Wants to Fuck Teens

Here's the thing about old guys getting boners, though. They don't want to fuck age-appropriate pussy. They want to relive the old days when they were young men crushing tight teen pussy like they grew on trees. Who wants to beat around a bush that's taken more beatings than a journeyman boxer? Guys want to stab their dicks in pussy that just came fresh off the factory floor.

Does that make us creeps? I don't give a shit if it does. Blame the Gods if you're upset that guys like young pussy. It's our genetics that demands a fertile uterus, not us. We are simply subject to the whims of nature. My dick and balls have a mind of their own, and I'm just along for the ride. 

If it makes you feel better, were men to have a choice, we wouldn't fuck teenagers. We get why that is wrong. Instead, if we could..... we would fuck two teenagers at the same time! That makes it better, correct? If you add the two ages together, you get one adult. That's math, baby.

If you're an old fuck who wants to bang multiple teens at once, you only have two options. The first is being rich as fuck. Bitches will fuck your corpse while your family lowers it into the ground if you pay them enough. The second is to be in the industry, baby. Old on young porn has a small but passionate fanbase willing to invest.

Trust me. When I become retirement age, the Porndude is switching directions to full-time porn performer. I'll exclusively work with teens and only in BGG format. In fact, you can tag as many "Gs" as you like. Just be sure not to add another "B."

I'm not the only one planning on fucking his way through his twilight years. I'm sure you all would love to make such plans if only you could get fucked now, let alone when you're ninety-five. If you're currently unfuckable, imagine how much of a hot mess you'll be as an old cock sucker. There is no way anyone will fuck you, even for money.

Instead, you'll have to watch the old dudes on Oldje3some fuck and pretend it's you. Honestly, you should really enjoy the realism. I'm not sure how these guys are getting fucked either. They have done everything but age gracefully.

Oldje 3some is a paid premium porn site exclusively focused on threesomes between one old guy and two beautiful young teens. I don't know how much they are paying these bitches, but it isn't enough. It could never be enough. These bitches pussies must be so dry when they arrive on set that the crew has to fire hose their labias down with lube before anyone can get to work.

The site might be themed around old fucks, but the web design is anything but. It's modern, clean, and I enjoy the dark background. Getting around the place is no problem. The main menu hangs out up top and includes the options Home, Search, Models, Videos, Live cams, Log in, and Join.

Who's Gunna Pay These Cunts?

As I mentioned previously, Oldje 3some is a paid premium site. Unfortunately, ad space couldn't bring in the kind of revenue required to pay these bitches enough, so they'll allow ancient wrinkly penises inside them. Only a subscription site can pull in that kind of dough. Regardless, I'm sure they are still getting underpaid. There isn't enough money under the sun to justify fucking these ugly old bastards.

Oldje 3some offers four different membership levels for possible subscribers to choose from. The first is a three-day trial period that will set you back about two euros. You can cancel or upgrade that at any time. I'm sure after you get a taste of the place, you'll be demanding more.

The second option is a one-month nonrecurring membership for about thirty euros. This is the most popular option because most guys are too retarded to do the math and are fully willing to waste money instead of add. However, you guys are Porndude readers. That means you're a brighter bunch than your average masturbator.

That's why I would recommend either the three-month or full-year memberships. The three months will cost you twenty-five euros and the year will cost you twenty-one. 

I would never lie to you fuck faces, so I'll be real with you. Twenty-one euros a month for a year subscription is on the expensive end of things. However, it's understandable as to why. 

First off, this is some pretty niche shit right here. It's not going to be everyone's cup of tea. That means if you want a slice of the pie, you'll have to cough up more than the usual price.

And second, as I said before, these bitches need to get paid. They require enough money to pay for rent and therapy. If these bitches are from the states, you know therapy is going to be expensive. 

From Sniffing to Fapping

Now that we have all of that cleared up, we can dip into some of the content on Oldje 3some, starting with "Caught Sniffing Panties," starring Eddie Montana, Jane Nedon, and Miriam More. 

After a long journey, Jane Nedon and Miriam More arrive at a bed and breakfast to check in with the manager Oldje. The ladies couldn't help but notice the way Oldje stared them down while getting a room key. It's clear that he has something on his mind.

But the ladies are exhausted from a day's travel, so they don't think much of it before heading to their rooms. Once there, they don't pass, go or collect two hundred dollars. They just strip down to their lingerie and go to bed.

As the ladies sleep, Oldje can't stop thinking about how sexy they are. He can still smell them from the lobby, and finally, he can't take it anymore. Oldje does his best ninja impression and sneaks silently into the room where Jane and Miriam slept. He picks up some of their clothing, sniffs it, and gets to jerking himself off.

At first, Oldje is quiet as a mouse, but as he loses himself in fantasy, he starts making a ruckus. The ladies are startled awake by all the commotion and turn on the lights only to discover Oldje with his dick out, wrapped in Jane's crimson panties. Talk about being caught red-handed.

However, to Oldje's shock, the ladies don't flee in abject horror as they should. Instead, they approach his cock like it's a fine steak and start sucking on the tip till his cock is hard as Damascus steel.

These bitches have a veracious appetite for cock. Once they finish sucking Oldje's cock and gargling his balls, they both bend over to be taken from the back. Oldje may be an old bastard, but he still knows how to handle fucking two teens at once. He must have done this before.

Eventually, every man hits his limit, and as Oldje approached his, the ladies shared his load over a sensual french kiss. Once all was said and done, I assume Oldje laid down for a twelve-hour nap.

For better or worse, thanks to modern medicians, old guys can fuck all the way up to their funeral. But who wants to fuck old women? Certainly not us. Head over to Oldje 3some to live a fantasy you never experienced as a young man and will certainly never experience as an old one.

I would love to see Oldje 3some lower the price for a one-year subscription, but I understand why they can't. These bitches need to get paid.

How does it make you feel to know that these old fucks get more pussy than you? Well, if you can't beat them, join them on Oldje.